I have been thinking about this post for awhile--close to 2 weeks to be exact. As many of you know, my husband and I took on a big project spontaneously on Saturday, April 7. Everyday, we were working. I would work while Simeon was at work, he would come home and we would work some more. Sanding, sawing, painting, scraping, pounding, cleaning. It seemed all that we did was work on this house. Some days it was stressful, and I let anger out, whilst other days, it was enjoyable, and exciting...being able to see the picture in my mind (and maybe Simeon's, but his mind just doesn't really work that way) come together.
Many days I worked, I would be listening to Matt Redman, Jonny Diaz, Kari Jobe, and other artists like them. I was also in the habit of listening to something from Mark Driscoll. As each day wavered on, I began to notice something. Every night, I was exhausted, but happy with the progress that was made. Every morning, I didn't want to get up and sand a floor, or paint poly on it, or do the drywall, but I did. We sacrificed our time, our gym time, even our alone time, to get this done. I kept focusing on these facts, then I realized that the picture was just like our God.
He is constantly working on each and every one of us. Some may be small changes, like putting in an outlet (adjusting a heart attitude that was already there), while some may be no less than major. He is constantly scraping away the stains, painting over the ugly colors with His blood, sacrificing Himself, day in, day out, for the betterment of me! Every single thing I did to our house, I asked God to show me what He was changing in me.
This project also made me realize how quick I am to get things done that are tangible. I don't sacrifice my time to be my Lord. We do our Bible reading, talk a little, pray then go to bed. These have been GREAT for us, so many new insights and truths have been revealed. But, if I truly want a change, am I going to sacrifice my time, energy, hanging out with friends to be pliable for Him? What if I did? What would He do?
I am sitting here on my couch, still admiring what a change has taken place in our home. I can't help but feel a smidge how must God have felt when creating the worlds. I am sitting here, proud, of all the work I have done. I can't help but feel similar to how proud the Father must be every time I allow another part of me to be scraped or sanded to perfection. I am sitting here, feeling accomplished, of all of the work I have done. I can't help but wonder if this is how He felt when His Son went to the cross and said "not my will, but yours, Father".
The funny thing is that we are still not done with our house by any means. We aren't even 100% done with this project. Just like our walk with faith, it is never completed, never finished until our Lord takes us home.
So this is my challenge to myself--to be still in His presence, to not rush it, and to allow God to "remodel" me. Not my will for my life, but His will for it.
Philippians 1:6 "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."